Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did.

Quote by George Carlin

Topics: George Carlin Quotes

I'm always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I'm listening to...

I'm always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I'm listening to...

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more...

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more...

Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait...

Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait...

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad...

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad...

Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.

Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.

The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.

The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that...

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that...

In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.

In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.

Isnt it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do 'practice?'

Isnt it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do 'practice?'

One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like.

One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like.

If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone...

If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone...

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out...

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out...

Standing ovations have become far too commonplace. What we need are ovations where the audience...

Standing ovations have become far too commonplace. What we need are ovations where the audience...

Electricity is really just organized lightning.

Electricity is really just organized lightning.

Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough...

Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough...

The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an...

The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an...

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that...

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that...

The crisis in black America is threefold...economic...political...and spiritual.

The crisis in black America is threefold...economic...political...and spiritual.

Why did men worship in churches, locking themselves away in the dark, when the world...

Why did men worship in churches, locking themselves away in the dark, when the world...

Drug therapies are replacing a lot of medicine as we used to know it.

Drug therapies are replacing a lot of medicine as we used to know it.

Sentimentality is a superstructure covering brutality.

Sentimentality is a superstructure covering brutality.