Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

Quote by George Carlin

Topics: Humanity Quotes

When I was a kid, if a guy got killed in a western movie I...

When I was a kid, if a guy got killed in a western movie I...

Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who...

Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who...

When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands.

When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands.

I put a dollar in one of those change machines. Nothing changed.

I put a dollar in one of those change machines. Nothing changed.

Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait...

Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait...

When I got out of high school they retired my jersey, but it was for...

When I got out of high school they retired my jersey, but it was for...

What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?

What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that...

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that...

I'm always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I'm listening to...

I'm always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I'm listening to...

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that...

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that...

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof...

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof...

Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left...

Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left...

I do this real moron thing, it's called thinking, and I'm not a very good...

I do this real moron thing, it's called thinking, and I'm not a very good...

Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who...

Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who...

If you think there's a solution, you're part of the problem

If you think there's a solution, you're part of the problem

Religion is just mind control

Religion is just mind control

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone...

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone...

The next time they give you all that civic bullshit about voting, keep in mind...

The next time they give you all that civic bullshit about voting, keep in mind...

The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an...

The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an...

The status quo sucks.

The status quo sucks.