Ive come to the conclusion that Mondays last 50% longer than the other days...each.

Quote by Turtle Dundee

Topics: Funny Quotes, Monday Quotes

A woman has the age she deserves.

A woman has the age she deserves.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the...

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the...

Have you seen my Kung fu lately? Cause it has gotten totally awsome!

Have you seen my Kung fu lately? Cause it has gotten totally awsome!

Women are not forgiven for aging. Robert Redford's lines of distinction are my old-age wrinkles.

Women are not forgiven for aging. Robert Redford's lines of distinction are my old-age wrinkles.

I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove...

I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove...

Relationships are hard. It's like a full-time job, and we should treat it like one....

Relationships are hard. It's like a full-time job, and we should treat it like one....

Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older, I begin each day with...

Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older, I begin each day with...

Speak when you are angry - and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret.

Speak when you are angry - and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret.

I'm trying to read a book on how to relax, but I keep falling asleep.

I'm trying to read a book on how to relax, but I keep falling asleep.

I was three over. One over a house, one over a patio, and one over...

I was three over. One over a house, one over a patio, and one over...

My mother had morning sickness after I was born.

My mother had morning sickness after I was born.

Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry.

Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry.

Exercise is a dirty word. Every time I hear it I wash my mouth out...

Exercise is a dirty word. Every time I hear it I wash my mouth out...

It is a terrible thing to look over your shoulder when you are trying to...

It is a terrible thing to look over your shoulder when you are trying to...

Hosting the Oscars is like making love to a beautiful woman - it's something I...

Hosting the Oscars is like making love to a beautiful woman - it's something I...

Pretty much all the honest truth telling there is in the world is done by...

Pretty much all the honest truth telling there is in the world is done by...

I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always 15 years...

I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always 15 years...

Catholics are necessarily at war with this age. That we are not more conscious of...

Catholics are necessarily at war with this age. That we are not more conscious of...

It's awful knowing that one seventh of our life will be wasted on Mondays.

It's awful knowing that one seventh of our life will be wasted on Mondays.

I think we're seeing in working mothers a change from 'Thank God it's Friday' to...

I think we're seeing in working mothers a change from 'Thank God it's Friday' to...