There is little chance that meteorologists can solve the mysteries of weather until they gain an understanding of the mutual attraction of rain and weekends.

Quote by Arnot Sheppard

Topics: Funny Quotes, Weekend Quotes

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep...

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep...

Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.

Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.

Happiness is like a kiss. You must share it to enjoy it.

Happiness is like a kiss. You must share it to enjoy it.

There is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught...

There is one thing I would break up over and that is if she caught...

[Reporter: How did you find America?] We turned left at Greenland.

[Reporter: How did you find America?] We turned left at Greenland.

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the...

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the...

Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.

Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Advice in old age is foolish; for what can be more absurd than to increase...

Advice in old age is foolish; for what can be more absurd than to increase...

Before God we are all equally wise - and equally foolish.

Before God we are all equally wise - and equally foolish.

And therefore education at the University mostly worked by the age-old method of putting a...

And therefore education at the University mostly worked by the age-old method of putting a...

What is wedlock forced but a hell, an age of discord and continual strife? Whereas...

What is wedlock forced but a hell, an age of discord and continual strife? Whereas...

It was one of the deadliest and heaviest feelings of my life to feel that...

It was one of the deadliest and heaviest feelings of my life to feel that...

I dont fear death, but I sure dont like those three-footers for par.

I dont fear death, but I sure dont like those three-footers for par.

My girlfriend always laughs during sex -- no matter what she's reading.

My girlfriend always laughs during sex -- no matter what she's reading.

If you see a bandwagon, its too late.

If you see a bandwagon, its too late.

Nothing makes me want a relationship to fail more than matching profile pictures.

Is there something in trade that desiccates and flattens out, that turns men into dried...

Is there something in trade that desiccates and flattens out, that turns men into dried...

Sunday clears away the rust of the whole week.

Sunday clears away the rust of the whole week.

The worst thing ever is making it through the work week only to be sick...

The worst thing ever is making it through the work week only to be sick...