In Beverly Hills...they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

Quote by Woody Allen

Topics: Funny Quotes, Hollywood Quotes

Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more...

Man consists of two parts, his mind and his body, only the body has more...

Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.

Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.

I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is...

I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is...

Right now it's only a notion, but I think I can get the money to...

Right now it's only a notion, but I think I can get the money to...

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down....

Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down....

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.

And my parents finally realize that I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: They...

And my parents finally realize that I'm kidnapped and they snap into action immediately: They...

I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it...

I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it...

Tradition is the illusion of permanance.

Tradition is the illusion of permanance.

His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.

His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.

Eternity is really long, especially near the end

Eternity is really long, especially near the end

I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.

I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that...

You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that...

A relationship, I think, is like a shark, you know? It has to constantly move...

A relationship, I think, is like a shark, you know? It has to constantly move...

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into...

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into...

Although we've come to the end of the road, still I can't let you go,...

Although we've come to the end of the road, still I can't let you go,...

Men always want to be a woman's first love. Women have a more subtle instinct:...

Men always want to be a woman's first love. Women have a more subtle instinct:...

Do you know the German phrase, 'You can steal horses with him'? It means a...

Do you know the German phrase, 'You can steal horses with him'? It means a...