I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson.

Quote by Chris Rock

Topics: Chris Rock Quotes

You could be married and bored or single and lonely. Ain't no happiness nowhere.

You could be married and bored or single and lonely. Ain't no happiness nowhere.

We got so much food in America we're allergic to food. Allergic to food! Hungry...

We got so much food in America we're allergic to food. Allergic to food! Hungry...

Who's judging American Idol? Paula Abdul? Paula Abdul judging a singing contest is like Christopher...

Who's judging American Idol? Paula Abdul? Paula Abdul judging a singing contest is like Christopher...

I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.

I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.

Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because...

Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because...

A man is only as faithful as his options.

A man is only as faithful as his options.

Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can...

Everyone has favorite criminals. Mine are pimps. We can all rob a bank; we can...

Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of...

Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of...

I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed...

I don't get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed...

Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He...

Charlie Brown is the one person I identify with. C.B. is such a loser. He...

Ja Rule is not Tupac

Ja Rule is not Tupac

Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know? People are nice to...

Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know? People are nice to...

Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of...

Black people dominate sports in the United States. 20% of the population and 90% of...

Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look...

Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look...

Jude Law is in so many movies, that I went to one, and when I...

Jude Law is in so many movies, that I went to one, and when I...

Welcome to the 77th and last Oscars.

Welcome to the 77th and last Oscars.

George Bush hates midgets.

George Bush hates midgets.

Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everybody else.

Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everybody else.

A white boy that makes C's in college can make it to the White House.

A white boy that makes C's in college can make it to the White House.

School shootings were invented by blacks... and stolen by the white man.

School shootings were invented by blacks... and stolen by the white man.