If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.

Quote by Will Rogers

Topics: Crime Quotes

Politics ain't worrying this country one-tenth as much as where to find a parking space.

Politics ain't worrying this country one-tenth as much as where to find a parking space.

The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself.

The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself.

Lord, the money we do spend on Government and it's not one bit better than...

Lord, the money we do spend on Government and it's not one bit better than...

You've got to be (an) optimist to be a Democrat, and you've got to be...

You've got to be (an) optimist to be a Democrat, and you've got to be...

People are getting smarter nowadays; they are letting lawyers, instead of their conscience, be their...

People are getting smarter nowadays; they are letting lawyers, instead of their conscience, be their...

Lord, the money we do spend on Government and it's not one bit better than...

Lord, the money we do spend on Government and it's not one bit better than...

All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi...

All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi...

Never miss a chance to shut up

Never miss a chance to shut up

You can't legislate intelligence and common sense into people

You can't legislate intelligence and common sense into people

Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to...

Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to...

I don't know what humor is. Anything that's funny -- tragedy or anything, it don't...

I don't know what humor is. Anything that's funny -- tragedy or anything, it don't...

There's only one thing that can kill the movies, and that's education.

There's only one thing that can kill the movies, and that's education.

So live that you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the familiy parrotto the town gossip.

So live that you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the familiy parrotto the town gossip.

The more that learn to read the less learn how to make a living. That's...

The more that learn to read the less learn how to make a living. That's...

Democrats never agree on anything, that's why they're Democrats. If they agreed with each other,...

Democrats never agree on anything, that's why they're Democrats. If they agreed with each other,...

Democrats are the only reason to vote for Republicans

Democrats are the only reason to vote for Republicans

The short memories of American voters is what keeps our politicians in office

The short memories of American voters is what keeps our politicians in office

Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a...

Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a...

You've got to go out on a limb sometimes because that's where the fruit is.

You've got to go out on a limb sometimes because that's where the fruit is.

The time to save is now. When a dog gets a bone, he doesn't go...

The time to save is now. When a dog gets a bone, he doesn't go...