Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there.
Quote by Will Rogers
Make crime pay. Become a Lawyer.
Many only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with...
Everything is changing. People are taking the comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
Politics is applesauce.
The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has....
I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out...
There is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off the...
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
You can't say civilization don't advance... in every war they kill you in a new...
The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has...
Never let yesterday use up too much of today.
A holding company is a thing where you hand an accomplice the goods while the...
Always drink upstream from the herd.
Politics ain't worrying this country one-tenth as much as where to find a parking space
There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for...
Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.
I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this - no nation is allowed to...
I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places...
I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We...
Nature is always behind the age.