I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?'
Quote by Jerry Seinfield
TV Series Quotes
A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are...
What is a date really, but a job interview that lasts all night? The only...
A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a...
There's more truth in comedy than in tragedy.
Comedy is tragedy plus time.
People are constantly saying, 'How's it feel to have such an impact?' I just want...
People who say you're just as old as you feel are all wrong, fortunately.
They say pantomime's a lost art. It's never been a lost art and never will...
I can't swim. I can't drive, either. I was going to learn to drive but...
James Caan told me at the end of filming 'Elf' that he had been waiting...
To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love. But then, one...
Oh yeah drugs, ya gotta have drugs.
I always approach comedy roles pretending they aren't funny.
A mind is like a parachute. If it doesn't open, you're fucked!
Why don't you climb down off the cross, take the wood to build a bridge,...
Life is too serious to do farce comedy.
Comedy is very controlling - you are making people laugh. It is there in the...
Comedy just pokes at problems, rarely confronts them squarely. Drama is like a plate of...
We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free.
Ah, yes, divorce ... from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals...
A push up bra is like a bag of chips; you open the bag and...
There's no half-singing in the shower, you're either a rock star or an opera diva.
I don't think she's a lesbian. I think she just ran out of men. [Charlotte]