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Door: What a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

Door: What a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind.

Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind.

The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.

The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.

The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we...

The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we...

Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave when they think that their children are...

Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave when they think that their children are...

Do you think my mind is maturing late, or simply rotted early?

Do you think my mind is maturing late, or simply rotted early?

Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for.

Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for.

Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.

Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.

An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a...

An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a...

A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick...

A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick...

I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers.

I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers.

Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you...

Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you...

An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a...

An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a...

Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave, when they think their children are naïve.

Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave, when they think their children are naïve.

Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.

Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.

Never befriend the oppressed unless you are prepared to take on the oppressor

Never befriend the oppressed unless you are prepared to take on the oppressor

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone...

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone...

If you don't want to work, you have to work to earn enough money so...

If you don't want to work, you have to work to earn enough money so...

Act like a horse. Be dumb. Just run.

Act like a horse. Be dumb. Just run.

The weariest and most loathed worldly life, that age, ache, penury and imprisonment can lay...

The weariest and most loathed worldly life, that age, ache, penury and imprisonment can lay...

The one important thing I have learned over the years is the difference between taking...

The one important thing I have learned over the years is the difference between taking...