The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.

Quote by Woody Allen

Topics: Food Quotes

It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.

It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by...

My luck is getting worse and worse. Last night, for instance, I was mugged by...

Don't knock masturbation - it's sex with someone I love

Don't knock masturbation - it's sex with someone I love

As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard...

As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard...

What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream?

What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream?

Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer sex raises some...

Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer sex raises some...

In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

In Beverly Hills... they don't throw their garbage away. They make it into television shows.

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with...

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with...

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.

I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead.

When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.

When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.

Practice random beauty and senseless acts of love.

Practice random beauty and senseless acts of love.

I have bad reflexes. I was once run over by a car being pushed by...

I have bad reflexes. I was once run over by a car being pushed by...

Sex is better than talk...Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to...

Sex is better than talk...Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to...

The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue...

The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue...

Love is the answer, but while youre waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty...

Love is the answer, but while youre waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty...

I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had...

I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had...

Love is not something that you can put chains on and throw into a lake....

Love is not something that you can put chains on and throw into a lake....

You can't force anyone to love you or lend you money.

You can't force anyone to love you or lend you money.