We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations. We're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.

Picture Quote by Rodney Dangerfield

We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations. We're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.

Topics: Funny Picture Quotes, Funny people Picture Quotes, Love Picture Quotes, Marriage Picture Quotes, Successful Marriage Picture Quotes

I'll tell ya my wife and I, we don't think alike She donates money to...

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I'll tell ya my wife and I, we don't think alike She donates money to...

I'm at the age where I want two girls In case I fall asleep they...

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I'm at the age where I want two girls In case I fall asleep they...

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and...

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What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and...

When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. No one showed...

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When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. No one showed...

I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a...

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I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a...

If it weren't for pick-pocketers, I'd have no sex life at all

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If it weren't for pick-pocketers, I'd have no sex life at all

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them

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When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she...

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It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she...

A lot of times when a package says 'Open other end', I purposely open the...

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A lot of times when a package says 'Open other end', I purposely open the...

Is that Vicondin? Breath mint. Thought you were going to kiss me

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Is that Vicondin? Breath mint. Thought you were going to kiss me

Chocolate doesn't ask silly questions, chocolate understands.

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Chocolate doesn't ask silly questions, chocolate understands.

Facebook should have a limit on how many times you can change your relationship status....

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Facebook should have a limit on how many times you can change your relationship status....

You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

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You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.

The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem. Do...

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The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem. Do...

You spent three days lying on a beach drinking rum? Welcome to the Carribbean love.

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You spent three days lying on a beach drinking rum? Welcome to the Carribbean love.

Dr. Cameron: You want me to tell a man whose wife is about to die...

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Dr. Cameron: You want me to tell a man whose wife is about to die...

My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping...

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My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping...

Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better...

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Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better...

Friends joke with one another. Hey, you're poor. Hey, your momma's dead. That's what friends...

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Friends joke with one another. Hey, you're poor. Hey, your momma's dead. That's what friends...

You know how they say that you can't live without love? Well oxigen is even...

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You know how they say that you can't live without love? Well oxigen is even...

Ancient lovers believed a kiss would literally unite their souls, because the spirit was said...

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Ancient lovers believed a kiss would literally unite their souls, because the spirit was said...