We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations. We're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.

Picture Quote by Rodney Dangerfield

We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations. We're doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.

Topics: Funny Picture Quotes, Funny people Picture Quotes, Love Picture Quotes, Marriage Picture Quotes, Successful Marriage Picture Quotes

If it weren't for pick-pocketers, I'd have no sex life at all

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If it weren't for pick-pocketers, I'd have no sex life at all

I'm at the age where I want two girls In case I fall asleep they...

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I'm at the age where I want two girls In case I fall asleep they...

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and...

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What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and...

When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. No one showed...

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When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. No one showed...

I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a...

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I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a...

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she...

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It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she...

I'll tell ya my wife and I, we don't think alike She donates money to...

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I'll tell ya my wife and I, we don't think alike She donates money to...

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them

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When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them

No family is perfect.. we argue, we fight. We even stop talking to each other...

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No family is perfect.. we argue, we fight. We even stop talking to each other...

Sister is probably the most competitive relationship within the family, but once the sisters are...

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Sister is probably the most competitive relationship within the family, but once the sisters are...

Love your parents. We are so busy growing up that we often forget that they...

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Love your parents. We are so busy growing up that we often forget that they...

Born out of wedlock. Put up for adoption at birth. Dropped out of college. Then...

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Born out of wedlock. Put up for adoption at birth. Dropped out of college. Then...

Ask not what your mother can do for you. Ask what you can do for...

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Ask not what your mother can do for you. Ask what you can do for...

Love your children and they will be able to outgrow you. Ignore your children and...

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Love your children and they will be able to outgrow you. Ignore your children and...

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree; the presence of a happy family...

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The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree; the presence of a happy family...

What can you do to promote world peace. Go home and love your family

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What can you do to promote world peace. Go home and love your family

All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.

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All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.

When you look at your life the greatest happiness are family happinesses.

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When you look at your life the greatest happiness are family happinesses.

Family is not about blood. It's about who is willing to hold your hand when...

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Family is not about blood. It's about who is willing to hold your hand when...

Daughter you are loved for the little girl you were.. The special woman you are...

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Daughter you are loved for the little girl you were.. The special woman you are...

A smile is the prettiest thing you can wear

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A smile is the prettiest thing you can wear