When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. No one showed up

Picture Quote by Rodney Dangerfield

When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. No one showed up

Topics: Family Picture Quotes, Funny Picture Quotes

I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a...

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I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a...

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them

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When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them

We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations. We're doing...

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We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations. We're doing...

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and...

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What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and...

I'll tell ya my wife and I, we don't think alike She donates money to...

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I'll tell ya my wife and I, we don't think alike She donates money to...

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she...

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It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she...

I'm at the age where I want two girls In case I fall asleep they...

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I'm at the age where I want two girls In case I fall asleep they...

If it weren't for pick-pocketers, I'd have no sex life at all

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If it weren't for pick-pocketers, I'd have no sex life at all

I left because you never asked me to stay

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I left because you never asked me to stay

You don't want to live your life and then meet someone. You want to share...

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You don't want to live your life and then meet someone. You want to share...

The scars of your love remind me of us They keep me thinking that we...

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The scars of your love remind me of us They keep me thinking that we...

I will always be there when I need you

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I will always be there when I need you

Maybe it's not always about trying to fix something broken. Maybe it's about starting over...

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Maybe it's not always about trying to fix something broken. Maybe it's about starting over...

All you can do is be brave enough to get out there. You fought. You...

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All you can do is be brave enough to get out there. You fought. You...

You can break down a woman temporarily but a real woman will always pick up...

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You can break down a woman temporarily but a real woman will always pick up...

The reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected

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The reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected

I was as born when he kissed me. I died when he left me. I...

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I was as born when he kissed me. I died when he left me. I...

If you were my husband, I'd poison your coffe." "If you were my wife I'd...

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If you were my husband, I'd poison your coffe.

Love one another, but make not a bond of love, let it rather be a...

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Love one another, but make not a bond of love, let it rather be a...

You need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person....

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You need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person....

My computer beat me at checkers, but I sure beat it at kickboxing.

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My computer beat me at checkers, but I sure beat it at kickboxing.

Before sex, a man isn't thinking clearly and a woman is thinking clearly. After sex,...

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Before sex, a man isn't thinking clearly and a woman is thinking clearly. After sex,...

It symbolize that she's my property and I own her

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It symbolize that she's my property and I own her