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When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them

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When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them

I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a...

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I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a...

I'll tell ya my wife and I, we don't think alike She donates money to...

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I'll tell ya my wife and I, we don't think alike She donates money to...

We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations. We're doing...

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We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations. We're doing...

When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. No one showed...

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When my parents got divorced, there was a custody fight over me. No one showed...

If it weren't for pick-pocketers, I'd have no sex life at all

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If it weren't for pick-pocketers, I'd have no sex life at all

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she...

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It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she...

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and...

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What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and...

Age ain't nothing but a number when it comes to loving someone.

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Age ain't nothing but a number when it comes to loving someone.

To be old and wise you must first have to be young and stupid

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To be old and wise you must first have to be young and stupid

We grow gray in our spirit long before we grow gray in our hair

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We grow gray in our spirit long before we grow gray in our hair

Age is whatever you think it is. You are as old as you think you...

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Age is whatever you think it is. You are as old as you think you...

Age does not protect you from love, but love to some extent protects you from...

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Age does not protect you from love, but love to some extent protects you from...

Youth can not know how age thinks and feels. But old men are guilty if...

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Youth can not know how age thinks and feels. But old men are guilty if...

I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life....

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I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life....

Some day you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again.

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Some day you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again.

In the age of information ignorance is a choice.

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In the age of information ignorance is a choice.

When people tell you how young you look, they are telling you how old you...

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When people tell you how young you look, they are telling you how old you...

Love is no respecter of age or practicality Neither morality: unabashed She enters where she...

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Love is no respecter of age or practicality Neither morality: unabashed She enters where she...

Age may wrinkle the face, but lack of enthusiasm wrinkles the soul

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Age may wrinkle the face, but lack of enthusiasm wrinkles the soul

Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out...

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Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out...

House Rules: Love each other Hold your head high Try everything once Laugh a lot...

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House Rules: Love each other Hold your head high Try everything once Laugh a lot...

You can't just sit around, savin' your heart for some perfect idea of a man...

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You can't just sit around, savin' your heart for some perfect idea of a man...