Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against all races.

Quote by Dan Castellaneta

Topics: Dan Castellaneta Quotes

Sometimes the only way you can feel good about yourself is by making someone else...

Sometimes the only way you can feel good about yourself is by making someone else...

Press the any key ... hmmm where's the any key?

Press the any key ... hmmm where's the any key?

All right, let's not panic. I'll make the money by selling one of my livers....

All right, let's not panic. I'll make the money by selling one of my livers....

In this house, we obey the laws of thermodynamics!

In this house, we obey the laws of thermodynamics!

Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life's problems.

Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life's problems.

One of my favorite episodes was the one in which Homer grew hair. That was...

One of my favorite episodes was the one in which Homer grew hair. That was...

I think that most people don't even know that I do other things. They think...

I think that most people don't even know that I do other things. They think...

Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step...

Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step...

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.

Bart! With $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...

Bart! With $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...

Don't eat me. I have a wife and kids. Eat them.

Don't eat me. I have a wife and kids. Eat them.

I won't sleep in the same bed with a woman who thinks I'm lazy! I'm...

I won't sleep in the same bed with a woman who thinks I'm lazy! I'm...

Well you know boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like women. You just have...

Well you know boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like women. You just have...

Now, son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies and kids with fake...

Now, son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies and kids with fake...

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

Good drink... good meat... good God, let's eat!

Good drink... good meat... good God, let's eat!

I think the tone of the show has certainly changed over the years, because it's...

I think the tone of the show has certainly changed over the years, because it's...

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

As the most participatory form of mass speech yet developed, the Internet deserves the highest...

As the most participatory form of mass speech yet developed, the Internet deserves the highest...

The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since...

The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since...