Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step over your own mother just to get one! But you can't stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!

Quote by Dan Castellaneta

Topics: Drink Quotes

I think the tone of the show has certainly changed over the years, because it's...

I think the tone of the show has certainly changed over the years, because it's...

Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against...

Getting out of jury duty is easy. The trick is to say you're prejudiced against...

I won't sleep in the same bed with a woman who thinks I'm lazy! I'm...

I won't sleep in the same bed with a woman who thinks I'm lazy! I'm...

I've made a kind of pact with myself where I said, It doesn't matter what...

I've made a kind of pact with myself where I said, It doesn't matter what...

It's the cushiest job, but some lines are so funny that I crack up.

It's the cushiest job, but some lines are so funny that I crack up.

One of my favorite episodes was the one in which Homer grew hair. That was...

One of my favorite episodes was the one in which Homer grew hair. That was...

If the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, it's that girls should...

If the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, it's that girls should...

Don't eat me. I have a wife and kids. Eat them.

Don't eat me. I have a wife and kids. Eat them.

I know what you're saying, Bart. When I was young, I wanted an electric football...

I know what you're saying, Bart. When I was young, I wanted an electric football...

Press the any key ... hmmm where's the any key?

Press the any key ... hmmm where's the any key?

Now, son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies and kids with fake...

Now, son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies and kids with fake...

It's a different way of getting across an emotion. You're trying to get it across...

It's a different way of getting across an emotion. You're trying to get it across...

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.

Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life's problems.

Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life's problems.

Press the any key ... hmmm where's the any key?

Press the any key ... hmmm where's the any key?

All right, let's not panic. I'll make the money by selling one of my livers....

All right, let's not panic. I'll make the money by selling one of my livers....

I think that most people don't even know that I do other things. They think...

I think that most people don't even know that I do other things. They think...

After years of doing it, you learn the difference between your ego and your opinion....

After years of doing it, you learn the difference between your ego and your opinion....

It's hard to find a play that's right for me to do. Rather than waiting...

It's hard to find a play that's right for me to do. Rather than waiting...

It is better to watch things then to do them.

It is better to watch things then to do them.