Don't eat me. I have a wife and kids. Eat them.

Quote by Dan Castellaneta

Topics: Dan Castellaneta Quotes

If I were actually Homer Simpson, I'd be getting scripts out the wazoo.

If I were actually Homer Simpson, I'd be getting scripts out the wazoo.

Go ahead and play the blues if it'll make you happy.

Go ahead and play the blues if it'll make you happy.

Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life's problems.

Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life's problems.

I often say, if I wasn't part of the show I'd be a huge fan...

I often say, if I wasn't part of the show I'd be a huge fan...

It's the cushiest job, but some lines are so funny that I crack up.

It's the cushiest job, but some lines are so funny that I crack up.

Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life's problems.

Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life's problems.

Press the any key ... hmmm where's the any key?

Press the any key ... hmmm where's the any key?

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution.

It's a different way of getting across an emotion. You're trying to get it across...

It's a different way of getting across an emotion. You're trying to get it across...

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

I know what you're saying, Bart. When I was young, I wanted an electric football...

I know what you're saying, Bart. When I was young, I wanted an electric football...

It is better to watch things then to do them.

It is better to watch things then to do them.

Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step...

Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step...

It's hard to find a play that's right for me to do. Rather than waiting...

It's hard to find a play that's right for me to do. Rather than waiting...

I think that most people don't even know that I do other things. They think...

I think that most people don't even know that I do other things. They think...

Press the any key ... hmmm where's the any key?

Press the any key ... hmmm where's the any key?

Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life's problems.

Alcohol is the cause and the solution to many of life's problems.

Bart! With $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...

Bart! With $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...

Money is indeed the most important thing in the world; and all sound and successful...

Money is indeed the most important thing in the world; and all sound and successful...

The function of the press in society is to inform, but its role in society...

The function of the press in society is to inform, but its role in society...