Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Quote by Homer Simpson

Topics: Beer Quotes, Food Quotes

You couldn't fool your mother on the foolingest day of your life if you had...

You couldn't fool your mother on the foolingest day of your life if you had...

This is a place for learning, not a house of... hearing about things.

This is a place for learning, not a house of... hearing about things.

Kill my boss? Do I dare live out the American dream?

Kill my boss? Do I dare live out the American dream?

I am not going to lie to you, Marge... ... ... Well, good bye.

I am not going to lie to you, Marge... ... ... Well, good bye.

Mmmmmmm. donuts/beer/erotic cakes.

Mmmmmmm. donuts/beer/erotic cakes.

No son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies, and kid's with fake...

No son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for daddies, and kid's with fake...

Sometimes you have to break the rules to free the heart.

Sometimes you have to break the rules to free the heart.

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it....

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it....

I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman.

I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman.

I don't mind being called a liar when I am lying, when I am about...

I don't mind being called a liar when I am lying, when I am about...

Yeah, Moe, that team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked! I've seen...

Yeah, Moe, that team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked! I've seen...

Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.

Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why...

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why...

Well, it's 1 a.m. Better go home and spend some quality time with the kids.

Well, it's 1 a.m. Better go home and spend some quality time with the kids.

People die all the time, just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow....

People die all the time, just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow....

Hey, what's the big deal about going to some building every Sunday? I mean, isn't...

Hey, what's the big deal about going to some building every Sunday? I mean, isn't...

Remember as far as anyone knows, were a nice normal family.

Remember as far as anyone knows, were a nice normal family.

Apu I need a keg and a six pack to hold me until I tap...

Apu I need a keg and a six pack to hold me until I tap...

When we can find some humor in our upsets, they no longer seem as large...

When we can find some humor in our upsets, they no longer seem as large...

I really hate sitcoms on television with canned laughter and stuff. What really makes me...

I really hate sitcoms on television with canned laughter and stuff. What really makes me...

The things that one most wants to do are the things that are probably most...

The things that one most wants to do are the things that are probably most...