Well, it's 1 a.m. Better go home and spend some quality time with the kids.

Quote by Homer Simpson

Topics: Homer Simpson Quotes

Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is like another nail.

Marriage is like a coffin and each kid is like another nail.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

Kids, you tried your best, and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

Beer is the cause and solution to all of life's problems

Beer is the cause and solution to all of life's problems

To alcohol! The cause of, and solution too, all of lifes problems.

To alcohol! The cause of, and solution too, all of lifes problems.

Yeah, Moe, that team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked! I've seen...

Yeah, Moe, that team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked! I've seen...

I don't think anything I've ever done is wrong!

I don't think anything I've ever done is wrong!

My campaign is a disaster, Moe. I hate the public so much. If only they'd...

My campaign is a disaster, Moe. I hate the public so much. If only they'd...

You know, boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like a woman. You just have...

You know, boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like a woman. You just have...

Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.

Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it....

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it....

This donut has purple in the middle, purple is a fruit.

This donut has purple in the middle, purple is a fruit.

Remember to rebel against the authorities, kids!

Remember to rebel against the authorities, kids!

That's okay, honey. I used to believe in things too.

That's okay, honey. I used to believe in things too.

Don't worry honey, daddy will fix that broken animal.

Don't worry honey, daddy will fix that broken animal.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Here's to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Lisa, if you don't like your job, you don't strike: you just go in every...

Lisa, if you don't like your job, you don't strike: you just go in every...

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why...

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why...

Hey, what's the big deal about going to some building every Sunday? I mean, isn't...

Hey, what's the big deal about going to some building every Sunday? I mean, isn't...

People die all the time, just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow....

People die all the time, just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow....