When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent.

Quote by George Carlin

Topics: George Carlin Quotes

I couldn't commit suicide if my life depended on it

I couldn't commit suicide if my life depended on it

In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.

In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof...

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof...

I remember when I was a kid I used to come home from Sunday School...

I remember when I was a kid I used to come home from Sunday School...

Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who...

Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who...

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called...

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called...

There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.

There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.

I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people...

I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people...

There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.

There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.

Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.

Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.

One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like.

One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like.

We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're...

We're having something a little different this year for Thanksgiving. Instead of a turkey, we're...

You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.

You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.

What are you going to do, play with your prick for another 20 to 30...

What are you going to do, play with your prick for another 20 to 30...

Think off-center.

Think off-center.

Baseball is the only major sport that appears backward in a mirror

Baseball is the only major sport that appears backward in a mirror

Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics should be told...

Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics should be told...

There is no woman in the world who does not abuse the power she has...

There is no woman in the world who does not abuse the power she has...

I think we're a kind of desperation. We're sort of a maddening luxury. The basic...

I think we're a kind of desperation. We're sort of a maddening luxury. The basic...

Men kick friendship around like a football but it doesn't seem to break. Women treat...

Men kick friendship around like a football but it doesn't seem to break. Women treat...