Quotes about Rodney Dangerfield

When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.

#Rodney Dangerfield

When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.

#Rodney Dangerfield

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bee and...

#Rodney Dangerfield

What a dog I got, his favorite bone is in my arm.

#Rodney Dangerfield

We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations - we're...

#Rodney Dangerfield

This morning when I put on my underwear I could hear the fruit-of-the-loom guys laughing...

#Rodney Dangerfield

The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I would be honest.

#Rodney Dangerfield

Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves...

#Rodney Dangerfield

One year they asked me to be poster boy - for birth control.

#Rodney Dangerfield

My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and...

#Rodney Dangerfield

My wife was afraid of the dark... then she saw me naked and now she's...

#Rodney Dangerfield