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I feel like getting something done today, so Im just going to sit here until...

I feel like getting something done today, so Im just going to sit here until...

I used to be good at sports. Then I realized that I could buy trophies....

I used to be good at sports. Then I realized that I could buy trophies....

It's a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny...

It's a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny...

My 'check engine' light came on while driving to work this morning. I looked and...

My 'check engine' light came on while driving to work this morning. I looked and...

Have you ever had a fly or small bug land on your computer screen and...

Have you ever had a fly or small bug land on your computer screen and...

You want to know someone who is amazing, beautiful and has the cutest smile ever?...

You want to know someone who is amazing, beautiful and has the cutest smile ever?...

Oxymoron: When an astronaut feels under the weather.

Oxymoron: When an astronaut feels under the weather.

To men, women are just city buses. There's another one every five minutes.

To men, women are just city buses. There's another one every five minutes.

Why do banks lock their pens to the desk? If i'm trusting you with my...

Why do banks lock their pens to the desk? If i'm trusting you with my...

The best time to look for a job is when you already have one. Men...

The best time to look for a job is when you already have one. Men...

I just dropped my laptop off the boat....It's a Dell, rolling in the deep.

I just dropped my laptop off the boat....It's a Dell, rolling in the deep.

Better late than never, but never late is better.

Better late than never, but never late is better.

Does anyone have that light switch in their house that they really don't know what...

Does anyone have that light switch in their house that they really don't know what...

If a person who drinks too much is an alcoholic, then is someone who never...

If a person who drinks too much is an alcoholic, then is someone who never...

I was complimented on my driving today. Someone left a note on my windshield that...

I was complimented on my driving today. Someone left a note on my windshield that...

Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept...

Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept...

Never on schedule, but always on time.

Never on schedule, but always on time.

The older the Facebook post, the creepier your 'Like' becomes.

The older the Facebook post, the creepier your 'Like' becomes.

Why is it that Facebook even gives me the option to 'Like' my own status?...

Why is it that Facebook even gives me the option to 'Like' my own status?...

If you quit Facebook, don't be pissed when I forget your birthday.

If you quit Facebook, don't be pissed when I forget your birthday.

I hate it when I am singing a song and the artist gets the words...

I hate it when I am singing a song and the artist gets the words...

Don't do drugs kids. There's a time and place for everything. It's called college.

Don't do drugs kids. There's a time and place for everything. It's called college.

Your face is not a coloring book. Chill with the makeup!

Your face is not a coloring book. Chill with the makeup!