I just dropped my laptop off the boat....It's a Dell, rolling in the deep.

Topics: Clever Facebook Status Quotes

Sometimes you have to make the right decision, and sometimes you have to make the...

Sometimes you have to make the right decision, and sometimes you have to make the...

Does anyone have that light switch in their house that they really don't know what...

Does anyone have that light switch in their house that they really don't know what...

It's a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny...

It's a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny...

Saying I don't take my meds because they make me feel funny. Is like cannibals...

Saying I don't take my meds because they make me feel funny. Is like cannibals...

When girls hack a friends Facebook account: 'I love you b*tch!' When boys hack a...

When girls hack a friends Facebook account: 'I love you b*tch!' When boys hack a...

Oxymoron: When an astronaut feels under the weather.

Oxymoron: When an astronaut feels under the weather.

I'm not clumsy. It's just the floor hates me, the tables and chairs are bullies...

I'm not clumsy. It's just the floor hates me, the tables and chairs are bullies...

I feel like getting something done today, so Im just going to sit here until...

I feel like getting something done today, so Im just going to sit here until...

To men, women are just city buses. There's another one every five minutes.

To men, women are just city buses. There's another one every five minutes.

I used to be good at sports. Then I realized that I could buy trophies....

I used to be good at sports. Then I realized that I could buy trophies....

Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept...

Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept...

I decided to cancel my Twitter account. I dont want to sound paranoid, but Im...

I decided to cancel my Twitter account. I dont want to sound paranoid, but Im...

The best time to look for a job is when you already have one. Men...

The best time to look for a job is when you already have one. Men...

I was complimented on my driving today. Someone left a note on my windshield that...

I was complimented on my driving today. Someone left a note on my windshield that...

I dont mind ketchup on my hot dog, as long as the bun is tight.

I dont mind ketchup on my hot dog, as long as the bun is tight.

Better late than never, but never late is better.

Better late than never, but never late is better.

Never on schedule, but always on time.

Never on schedule, but always on time.