The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.

Quote by Roseanne Barr

Topics: Roseanne Barr Quotes

I hate every human being on earth. I feel that everyone is beneath me, and...

I hate every human being on earth. I feel that everyone is beneath me, and...

My husband and I didn't sign a pre-nuptial agreement. We signed a mutual suicide pact.

My husband and I didn't sign a pre-nuptial agreement. We signed a mutual suicide pact.

I figure if my kids are alive at the end of the day, I've done...

I figure if my kids are alive at the end of the day, I've done...

A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So, first you gotta get rid of...

A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So, first you gotta get rid of...

It's okay to be fat. So you're fat. Just be fat and shut up about...

It's okay to be fat. So you're fat. Just be fat and shut up about...

I consider myself to be a pretty good judge of people... that's why I don't...

I consider myself to be a pretty good judge of people... that's why I don't...

I figure that if the children are alive when I get home, I've done my...

I figure that if the children are alive when I get home, I've done my...

I know how to do anythingI'm a mom

I know how to do anythingI'm a mom

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the...

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the...

Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time?...

Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time?...

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be...

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be...

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take...

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take...

There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a...

There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a...

Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the...

Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the...

As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband...

As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband...

Excuse the mess but we live here.

Excuse the mess but we live here.

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the...

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the...

But they for whom I am the supreme goal, who do all work renouncing self...

But they for whom I am the supreme goal, who do all work renouncing self...

I can do anything. In GQ, I appeared as a man.

I can do anything. In GQ, I appeared as a man.

Keep up appearances whatever you do.

Keep up appearances whatever you do.