I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.

Quote by Roseanne Barr

Topics: Housekeeping Quotes, Humor Quotes

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take...

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take...

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the...

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the...

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take...

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take...

My daughter made me a Jerry Springer-watching kit, with crackers, Cheez Whiz, polyester stretch pants...

My daughter made me a Jerry Springer-watching kit, with crackers, Cheez Whiz, polyester stretch pants...

I figure if my kids are alive at the end of the day, I've done...

I figure if my kids are alive at the end of the day, I've done...

There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a...

There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a...

The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.

The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest.

Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time?...

Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time?...

I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.

I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.

My husband and I didn't sign a pre-nuptial agreement. We signed a mutual suicide pact.

My husband and I didn't sign a pre-nuptial agreement. We signed a mutual suicide pact.

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the...

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the...

The thing women have got to learn is that nobody gives you power. You just...

The thing women have got to learn is that nobody gives you power. You just...

There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a...

There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a...

I was completely nuts for most of my life.

I was completely nuts for most of my life.

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be...

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be...

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be...

My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be...

I hate every human being on earth. I feel that everyone is beneath me, and...

I hate every human being on earth. I feel that everyone is beneath me, and...

The man of knowledge must be able not only to love his enemies but also...

The man of knowledge must be able not only to love his enemies but also...

When we don't know who to hate, we hate ourselves.

When we don't know who to hate, we hate ourselves.

Let them hate, so long as they fear.

Let them hate, so long as they fear.