Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear the phone is for you.

Quote by Fran Lebowitz

Topics: Fran Lebowitz Quotes

All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.

All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.

Designer clothes worn by children are like snowsuits worn by adults. Few can carry it...

Designer clothes worn by children are like snowsuits worn by adults. Few can carry it...

If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of...

If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of...

If your sexual fantasies were truly of interest to others, they would no longer be...

If your sexual fantasies were truly of interest to others, they would no longer be...

Don't bother discussing sex with small children. They rarely have anything to add.

Don't bother discussing sex with small children. They rarely have anything to add.

Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I assure...

Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I assure...

Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is...

Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is...

Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq.

Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq.

I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or...

I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or...

If you're going to America, bring your own food.

If you're going to America, bring your own food.

Your life story would not make a good book. Don't even try.

Your life story would not make a good book. Don't even try.

If you're going to America, bring your own food.

If you're going to America, bring your own food.

When you leave New York, you are astonished at how clean the rest of the...

When you leave New York, you are astonished at how clean the rest of the...

My desire to curtail undue freedom of speech extends only to such public areas as...

My desire to curtail undue freedom of speech extends only to such public areas as...

Los Angeles is a large city-like area surrounding the Beverly Hills Hotel

Los Angeles is a large city-like area surrounding the Beverly Hills Hotel

Very few people possess true artistic ability. It is therefore both unseemly and unproductive to...

Very few people possess true artistic ability. It is therefore both unseemly and unproductive to...

If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest...

If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest...

Polite conversation is rarely either.

Polite conversation is rarely either.

If you ever have to support a flagging conversation, introduce the topic of eating

If you ever have to support a flagging conversation, introduce the topic of eating

I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull...

I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull...