Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.

Quote by Ogden Nash

Topics: Ogden Nash Quotes

Do you think my mind is maturing late, or simply rotted early?

Do you think my mind is maturing late, or simply rotted early?

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone...

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone...

Commitments the voters don't know about can't hurt you.

Commitments the voters don't know about can't hurt you.

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you...

Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you...

I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless...

I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless...

I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers.

I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers.

Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet...

Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet...

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind.

Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind.

Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you...

Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you...

Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.

Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.

An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a...

An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a...

Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.

Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an...

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an...

Love is a word that is constantly heard, Hate is a word that is not....

Love is a word that is constantly heard, Hate is a word that is not....

Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker.

Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker.

I have an idea that the phrase 'weaker sex' was coined by some woman to...

I have an idea that the phrase 'weaker sex' was coined by some woman to...

The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.

The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.

People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they...

People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they...