Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you

Quote by Ogden Nash

Topics: Age Quotes, Ageing Quotes, Funny Quotes, Priorities Quotes

Daybreak is one of the greatest disadvantages of living under the solar system: It means...

Daybreak is one of the greatest disadvantages of living under the solar system: It means...

If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so...

If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so...

If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so...

If you don't want to work you have to work to earn enough money so...

Women would rather be right than reasonable.

Women would rather be right than reasonable.

Love is a word that is constantly heard, Hate is a word that is not....

Love is a word that is constantly heard, Hate is a word that is not....

The only people who should really sin are the people who can sin and grin.

The only people who should really sin are the people who can sin and grin.

Your hair may be brushed, but your mind's untidy. You've had about seven hours of...

Your hair may be brushed, but your mind's untidy. You've had about seven hours of...

When I look at you every aged phrase is new, and there are moments when...

When I look at you every aged phrase is new, and there are moments when...

Never befriend the oppressed unless you are prepared to take on the oppressor

Never befriend the oppressed unless you are prepared to take on the oppressor

I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless...

I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless...

There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is...

There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is...

They take the paper and they read the headlines, so they've heard of unemployment and...

They take the paper and they read the headlines, so they've heard of unemployment and...

People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.

People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.

Hark to the whimper of the seagull. / He weeps because he's not an ea-gull....

Hark to the whimper of the seagull. / He weeps because he's not an ea-gull....

I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era...

I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era...

The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.

The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.

Children aren't happy without something to ignore, And that's what parents were created for.

Children aren't happy without something to ignore, And that's what parents were created for.

An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a...

An occasional lucky guess as to what makes a wife tick is the best a...

Innocence is lucky if it finds the same protection as guilt

Innocence is lucky if it finds the same protection as guilt

Nothing is as obnoxious as other people's luck.

Nothing is as obnoxious as other people's luck.

What makes men indifferent to their wives is that they can see them when they...

What makes men indifferent to their wives is that they can see them when they...