I'll have a vanilla... one of those vanilla bullshit things. You know, whatever you want, some vanilla bullshit latte cappa thing. Whatever you got.

Quote by Larry David

Topics: Larry David Quotes

Switzerland is a place where they don't like to fight, so they get people to...

Switzerland is a place where they don't like to fight, so they get people to...

Even back then, I exuded self-confidence, and that drives women crazy.

Even back then, I exuded self-confidence, and that drives women crazy.

I've led this empty life for over forty years and now I can pass that...

I've led this empty life for over forty years and now I can pass that...

I'm really only happy when I'm on stage. I just feed off the energy of...

I'm really only happy when I'm on stage. I just feed off the energy of...

Well, as you know, I'm really only happy when I'm on stage.

Well, as you know, I'm really only happy when I'm on stage.

I just wanted laughs - that's really what I was after.

I just wanted laughs - that's really what I was after.

If you tell the truth about how youre feeling, it becomes funny.

If you tell the truth about how youre feeling, it becomes funny.

Women love a self-confident bald man.

Women love a self-confident bald man.

Most of the time I'm thinking, I'm glad that scene was improvised.

Most of the time I'm thinking, I'm glad that scene was improvised.

I learned the first night that IHOP's not the place to order fish.

I learned the first night that IHOP's not the place to order fish.

Drugs scared me.

Drugs scared me.

It has to do - I think - with growing up in an apartment, with...

It has to do - I think - with growing up in an apartment, with...

I guess I still feel that I'm a comedian; if I had to pick one...

I guess I still feel that I'm a comedian; if I had to pick one...

I think that for the most part, when I started doing comedy, it had become...

I think that for the most part, when I started doing comedy, it had become...

Anyone can be confident with a full head of hair. But a confident bald man...

Anyone can be confident with a full head of hair. But a confident bald man...

Hey, I may loathe myself, but it has nothing to do with the fact that...

Hey, I may loathe myself, but it has nothing to do with the fact that...

Millions of people are married. I've never picked up a paper and seen a headline...

Millions of people are married. I've never picked up a paper and seen a headline...

You write about what you know.

You write about what you know.

Until I started doing standup, there were some very bleak days.

Until I started doing standup, there were some very bleak days.

When I was living in New York and didn't have a penny to my name,...

When I was living in New York and didn't have a penny to my name,...