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I had a job as a paralegal. I drove a cab.

I had a job as a paralegal. I drove a cab.

I just feed off the energy of the audience.

I just feed off the energy of the audience.

I just wanted laughs - that's really what I was after.

I just wanted laughs - that's really what I was after.

I learned the first night that IHOP's not the place to order fish.

I learned the first night that IHOP's not the place to order fish.

I tell people that I've now done one decent thing in my life. Albeit inadvertently.

I tell people that I've now done one decent thing in my life. Albeit inadvertently.

I think that for the most part, when I started doing comedy, it had become...

I think that for the most part, when I started doing comedy, it had become...

I wanted to make a living, but I really was not interested in money at...

I wanted to make a living, but I really was not interested in money at...

I was planning on my future as a homeless person. I had a really good...

I was planning on my future as a homeless person. I had a really good...

I was very fortunate to hook up with Jerry in the first place. The network...

I was very fortunate to hook up with Jerry in the first place. The network...

I'm a walking, talking enigma.

I'm a walking, talking enigma.

I'm really only happy when I'm on stage. I just feed off the energy of...

I'm really only happy when I'm on stage. I just feed off the energy of...

I don't think anyone really is interested in reading about my emotional state. It's not...

I don't think anyone really is interested in reading about my emotional state. It's not...

I guess I still feel that I'm a comedian; if I had to pick one...

I guess I still feel that I'm a comedian; if I had to pick one...

When you're not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom.

When you're not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom.

Women love a self-confident bald man.

Women love a self-confident bald man.

You write about what you know.

You write about what you know.

Actually I walk around with the Emmy wherever I go, but I'm very casual about...

Actually I walk around with the Emmy wherever I go, but I'm very casual about...

And eventually as I kept writing it, something emerged that was not quite me but...

And eventually as I kept writing it, something emerged that was not quite me but...