If you wouldn't write it and sign it, don't say it.

Quote by Earl Wilson

Topics: Earl Wilson Quotes

You may not be able to read a doctor's handwriting and prescription, but you'll notice...

You may not be able to read a doctor's handwriting and prescription, but you'll notice...

A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings.

A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings.

For the parents of a Little Leaguer, a baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown...

For the parents of a Little Leaguer, a baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown...

A woman may race to get a man a gift but it always ends in...

A woman may race to get a man a gift but it always ends in...

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Ever notice that the whisper of temptation can be heard farther than the loudest call...

Ever notice that the whisper of temptation can be heard farther than the loudest call...

A vacation is what you take when you can no longer take what you've been...

A vacation is what you take when you can no longer take what you've been...

A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings.

A baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown divided into nine innings.

For the parents of a Little Leaguer, a baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown...

For the parents of a Little Leaguer, a baseball game is simply a nervous breakdown...

To sell something, tell a woman it's a bargain; tell a man it's deductible.

To sell something, tell a woman it's a bargain; tell a man it's deductible.

Benjamin Franklin may have discovered electricity, but it was the man who invented the meter...

Benjamin Franklin may have discovered electricity, but it was the man who invented the meter...

Gossip, n.: Hearing something you like about someone you don't.

Gossip, n.: Hearing something you like about someone you don't.

Nothing is as embarrassing as watching your boss do something you assured him couldn't be...

Nothing is as embarrassing as watching your boss do something you assured him couldn't be...

Nonchalance is the ability to remain down to earth when everything else is up in...

Nonchalance is the ability to remain down to earth when everything else is up in...

The man who didn't want his wife to work has been succeeded by the man...

The man who didn't want his wife to work has been succeeded by the man...

Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough.

Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough.

Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough.

Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough.

I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved.

I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved.

Whenever the talk turns to age, I say I am 49 plus VAT.

Whenever the talk turns to age, I say I am 49 plus VAT.

Home wasn't built in a day.

Home wasn't built in a day.

Unless we make Christmas an occasion to share our blessings, all the snow in Alaska...

Unless we make Christmas an occasion to share our blessings, all the snow in Alaska...