I want to mail my mailman something. He always brings me mail, yet I never give him any mail. Maybe he will appreciate the thought, or maybe he will feel I am making more work for him.

Quote by Jarod Kintz

Topics: Bizarre Quotes, Funny Quotes, Humor Quotes, Mail Quotes, Silly Quotes

I want to be happy and sad at the same time. Yeah, I know it...

I want to be happy and sad at the same time. Yeah, I know it...

When I saw you, I saw love. When I saw you naked, I saw lust....

When I saw you, I saw love. When I saw you naked, I saw lust....

I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull...

I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull...

The morning always has a way of creeping up on me and peeking in my...

The morning always has a way of creeping up on me and peeking in my...

I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. In...

I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. In...

Dont go looking for pancakes when you have flapjacks at home.

Dont go looking for pancakes when you have flapjacks at home.

If I told you Ive worked hard to get where Im at, Id be lying,...

If I told you Ive worked hard to get where Im at, Id be lying,...

I went to a football game once and got punched in the face, but you...

I went to a football game once and got punched in the face, but you...

All men are created Equal. Some just have more Splenda.

All men are created Equal. Some just have more Splenda.

Im at the top of my game. And that game is Monopoly. Im standing on...

Im at the top of my game. And that game is Monopoly. Im standing on...

I may not be a horse whisperer, but I certainly can and do shout at...

I may not be a horse whisperer, but I certainly can and do shout at...

Return something not for the possibility of a reward, but for the joy of giving...

Return something not for the possibility of a reward, but for the joy of giving...

The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn't around...

The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn't around...

The dollar isnt worth its weight in gold, and the pound isnt worth its weight...

The dollar isnt worth its weight in gold, and the pound isnt worth its weight...

If I can delay your action with my inaction, then Ill gladly do nothing for...

If I can delay your action with my inaction, then Ill gladly do nothing for...

Whether you live to be 50 or 100 makes no difference, if you made no...

Whether you live to be 50 or 100 makes no difference, if you made no...

The other day I went to the Huddle House. I wasnt hungry, I just wanted...

The other day I went to the Huddle House. I wasnt hungry, I just wanted...

Football brings out the sociologist that lurks in some otherwise respectable citizens. They say football...

Football brings out the sociologist that lurks in some otherwise respectable citizens. They say football...

Some people think football is a matter of life and death. I assure you, it's...

Some people think football is a matter of life and death. I assure you, it's...

Sectional football games have the glory and the despair of war, and when a Texas...

Sectional football games have the glory and the despair of war, and when a Texas...

I have a theory of relatives, too. Don't hire 'em.

I have a theory of relatives, too. Don't hire 'em.