I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. In other words, I want to get married.

Quote by Jarod Kintz

Topics: Cynicism Quotes, Humor Quotes, Marriage Quotes, Time Quotes

The dollar isnt worth its weight in gold, and the pound isnt worth its weight...

The dollar isnt worth its weight in gold, and the pound isnt worth its weight...

I went to a football game once and got punched in the face, but you...

I went to a football game once and got punched in the face, but you...

My two favorite colors of the rainbow are gold and leprechaun.

My two favorite colors of the rainbow are gold and leprechaun.

From the ages of 8-18, me and my family moved around a lot. Mostly we...

From the ages of 8-18, me and my family moved around a lot. Mostly we...

I want to be happy and sad at the same time. Yeah, I know it...

I want to be happy and sad at the same time. Yeah, I know it...

The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn't around...

The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn't around...

I may not be a horse whisperer, but I certainly can and do shout at...

I may not be a horse whisperer, but I certainly can and do shout at...

The morning always has a way of creeping up on me and peeking in my...

The morning always has a way of creeping up on me and peeking in my...

If I can delay your action with my inaction, then Ill gladly do nothing for...

If I can delay your action with my inaction, then Ill gladly do nothing for...

Im at the top of my game. And that game is Monopoly. Im standing on...

Im at the top of my game. And that game is Monopoly. Im standing on...

I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull...

I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull...

I want to mail my mailman something. He always brings me mail, yet I never...

I want to mail my mailman something. He always brings me mail, yet I never...

The US is about to go all Billy the Kid. Inflation is going to keep...

The US is about to go all Billy the Kid. Inflation is going to keep...

If I told you Ive worked hard to get where Im at, Id be lying,...

If I told you Ive worked hard to get where Im at, Id be lying,...

Return something not for the possibility of a reward, but for the joy of giving...

Return something not for the possibility of a reward, but for the joy of giving...

Dont go looking for pancakes when you have flapjacks at home.

Dont go looking for pancakes when you have flapjacks at home.

When I saw you, I saw love. When I saw you naked, I saw lust....

When I saw you, I saw love. When I saw you naked, I saw lust....

If you work in a hospital, you cant easily fake call in sick to work....

If you work in a hospital, you cant easily fake call in sick to work....

Age wrinkles the body. Quitting wrinkles the soul.

Age wrinkles the body. Quitting wrinkles the soul.

Hosting the Oscars is like making love to a beautiful woman - it's something I...

Hosting the Oscars is like making love to a beautiful woman - it's something I...

One of the most difficult things to contend with in a hospital is the assumption...

One of the most difficult things to contend with in a hospital is the assumption...

Men will confess to treason, murder, arson, false teeth, or a wig. How many of...

Men will confess to treason, murder, arson, false teeth, or a wig. How many of...

We understand that you can't transform people who don't have internal drive and desire to...

We understand that you can't transform people who don't have internal drive and desire to...