The morning always has a way of creeping up on me and peeking in my bedroom windows. The sunrise is such a pervert.

Quote by Jarod Kintz

Topics: Funny Good Morning Quotes

Im at the top of my game. And that game is Monopoly. Im standing on...

Im at the top of my game. And that game is Monopoly. Im standing on...

I may not be a horse whisperer, but I certainly can and do shout at...

I may not be a horse whisperer, but I certainly can and do shout at...

I want to be happy and sad at the same time. Yeah, I know it...

I want to be happy and sad at the same time. Yeah, I know it...

I want to mail my mailman something. He always brings me mail, yet I never...

I want to mail my mailman something. He always brings me mail, yet I never...

All men are created Equal. Some just have more Splenda.

All men are created Equal. Some just have more Splenda.

I went to a football game once and got punched in the face, but you...

I went to a football game once and got punched in the face, but you...

When I saw you, I saw love. When I saw you naked, I saw lust....

When I saw you, I saw love. When I saw you naked, I saw lust....

My two favorite colors of the rainbow are gold and leprechaun.

My two favorite colors of the rainbow are gold and leprechaun.

The US is about to go all Billy the Kid. Inflation is going to keep...

The US is about to go all Billy the Kid. Inflation is going to keep...

If I can delay your action with my inaction, then Ill gladly do nothing for...

If I can delay your action with my inaction, then Ill gladly do nothing for...

I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. In...

I want my time to be taken up by chores, errands, appointments, and arguments. In...

The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn't around...

The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn't around...

The other day I went to the Huddle House. I wasnt hungry, I just wanted...

The other day I went to the Huddle House. I wasnt hungry, I just wanted...

If I told you Ive worked hard to get where Im at, Id be lying,...

If I told you Ive worked hard to get where Im at, Id be lying,...

The dollar isnt worth its weight in gold, and the pound isnt worth its weight...

The dollar isnt worth its weight in gold, and the pound isnt worth its weight...

From the ages of 8-18, me and my family moved around a lot. Mostly we...

From the ages of 8-18, me and my family moved around a lot. Mostly we...

Dont go looking for pancakes when you have flapjacks at home.

Dont go looking for pancakes when you have flapjacks at home.

Four misfortunes befall a heedless man who commits adultery: acquisition of demerit, disturbed sleep, thirdly...

Four misfortunes befall a heedless man who commits adultery: acquisition of demerit, disturbed sleep, thirdly...

Husbands are chiefly good lovers when they are betraying their wives.

Husbands are chiefly good lovers when they are betraying their wives.

Guilt and no guilt: these were the worst things. The only thing worse than the...

Guilt and no guilt: these were the worst things. The only thing worse than the...

The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.

The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.

Those annoying girls who always try to flirt with guys who have girlfriends. Go away!

Those annoying girls who always try to flirt with guys who have girlfriends. Go away!