I lapsed into rude.

Quote by Dennis Miller

Topics: Dennis Miller Quotes

Now, I don't want to get off on a rant here, but guilt is simply...

Now, I don't want to get off on a rant here, but guilt is simply...

Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live.

Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live.

Parenting is the most important job on the planet next to keeping Gary Busey off...

Parenting is the most important job on the planet next to keeping Gary Busey off...

A new poll shows that Senator Kerry's support in the South is strongest amongst blacks....

A new poll shows that Senator Kerry's support in the South is strongest amongst blacks....

Liberals should not overplay this weapons of mass destruction card, because you want me to...

Liberals should not overplay this weapons of mass destruction card, because you want me to...

The only way the French are going in is if we tell them we found...

The only way the French are going in is if we tell them we found...

The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country.

The death penalty is becoming a way of life in this country.

Never ever discount the idea of marriage. Sure, someone might tell you that marriage is...

Never ever discount the idea of marriage. Sure, someone might tell you that marriage is...

I rant, therefore I am.

I rant, therefore I am.

The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What's...

The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. Surgery on dead people. What's...

Human beings are human beings. They say what they want, don't they? They used to...

Human beings are human beings. They say what they want, don't they? They used to...

You know there is a problem with the education system when you realize that out...

You know there is a problem with the education system when you realize that out...

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section was....

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section was....

Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch.

Here in Hollywood you can actually get a marriage license printed on an Etch-A-Sketch.

I've always loved the flirtatious tango of consonants and vowels, the sturdy dependability of nouns...

I've always loved the flirtatious tango of consonants and vowels, the sturdy dependability of nouns...

It's ironic that in our culture everyone's biggest complaint is about not having enough time;...

It's ironic that in our culture everyone's biggest complaint is about not having enough time;...

Parenting is the most important job on the planet next to keeping Gary Busey off...

Parenting is the most important job on the planet next to keeping Gary Busey off...

I'm like Bush, I see the world more like checkers than chess.

I'm like Bush, I see the world more like checkers than chess.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

Chess is not only knowledge and logic.

Chess is not only knowledge and logic.

About age 30 most women think about having children, most men think about dating them.

About age 30 most women think about having children, most men think about dating them.