Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac
Quote by George Carlin
Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left...
What are you going to do, play with your prick for another 20 to 30...
Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who...
Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
Just think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize half of them...
Religion is just mind control.
When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in...
Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough...
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more...
When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to...
I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will...
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it
You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.
There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.
I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. We haven't tried that...
If a movie is described as a romantic comedy you can usually find me next...
What's done to children, they will do to society
It took only 50 years for movies to go from silent to unspeakable.