Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker.

Quote by Ogden Nash

Topics: Ogden Nash Quotes

Middle age ends and senescence begins, The day your descendants outnumber your friends.

Middle age ends and senescence begins, The day your descendants outnumber your friends.

Do you think my mind is maturing late, or simply rotted early?

Do you think my mind is maturing late, or simply rotted early?

The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we...

The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we...

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an...

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an...

I would live all my life in nonchalance and insouciance, Were it not for making...

I would live all my life in nonchalance and insouciance, Were it not for making...

I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era...

I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era...

I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers.

I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers.

People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they...

People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they...

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone...

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone...

Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for.

Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for.

I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless...

I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless...

The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.

The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.

Sleep is perverse as human nature, Sleep is perverse as a legislature, Sleep is as...

Sleep is perverse as human nature, Sleep is perverse as a legislature, Sleep is as...

Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn't it, of a long line of proven...

Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn't it, of a long line of proven...

Door: What a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

Door: What a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.

Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.

Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.

Children aren't happy without something to ignore, And that's what parents were created for.

Children aren't happy without something to ignore, And that's what parents were created for.

The most exciting happiness is the happiness generated by forces beyond your control.

The most exciting happiness is the happiness generated by forces beyond your control.

True happiness...is not attained through self-gratification, but through fidelity to a worthy purpose

True happiness...is not attained through self-gratification, but through fidelity to a worthy purpose

Actions are right in proportion as they tend to promote happiness; wrong as they tend...

Actions are right in proportion as they tend to promote happiness; wrong as they tend...