And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said he would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.

Quote by Spike Milligan

Topics: Funny Quotes, God Quotes

Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of...

Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of...

Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of...

Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of...

Money couldn't buy you friends, but you get a better class of enemy.

Money couldn't buy you friends, but you get a better class of enemy.

I'm a hero with coward's legs.

I'm a hero with coward's legs.

Money can't buy friends but it can get you a better class of enemy

Money can't buy friends but it can get you a better class of enemy

My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic.

My Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic.

I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why...

I thought I'd begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why...

I'm not afraid of dying I just don't want to be there when it happens.

I'm not afraid of dying I just don't want to be there when it happens.

All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy

All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy

All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

This silent call you make, A silence so loud I fear the world knows it's...

This silent call you make, A silence so loud I fear the world knows it's...

Money can't buy friends but it can get you a better class of enemy

Money can't buy friends but it can get you a better class of enemy

I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove...

I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove...

For ten years Caesar ruled with an iron hand. Then with a wooden foot, and...

For ten years Caesar ruled with an iron hand. Then with a wooden foot, and...

It's all in the mind, you know.

It's all in the mind, you know.

Money can't buy friends but it can get you a better class of enemy.

Money can't buy friends but it can get you a better class of enemy.

Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?

Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?

Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.

Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.

Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.

Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.

I can speak Esperanto like a native.

I can speak Esperanto like a native.