A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree.

Quote by Spike Milligan

Topics: Spike Milligan Quotes

How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.

How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.

Money couldn't buy you friends, but you get a better class of enemy.

Money couldn't buy you friends, but you get a better class of enemy.

All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy

All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy

I'm a hero with coward's legs.

I'm a hero with coward's legs.

I thought I'd begin by reading a sonnet by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why...

I thought I'd begin by reading a sonnet by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why...

I'm not afraid of dying I just don't want to be there when it happens.

I'm not afraid of dying I just don't want to be there when it happens.

It's all in the mind, you know.

It's all in the mind, you know.

All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy

All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.

All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

Money couldn't buy friends, but you got a better class of enemy.

Money couldn't buy friends, but you got a better class of enemy.

All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

Money can't buy friends but it can get you a better class of enemy.

Money can't buy friends but it can get you a better class of enemy.

Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.

Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order.

I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.

I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.

I can speak Esperanto like a native.

I can speak Esperanto like a native.

Money can't buy friends but it can get you a better class of enemy

Money can't buy friends but it can get you a better class of enemy

Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.

Contraceptives should be used on every conceivable occasion.

For ten years Caesar ruled with an iron hand. Then with a wooden foot, and...

For ten years Caesar ruled with an iron hand. Then with a wooden foot, and...

I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe's singing until somebody told me that it...

I spent many years laughing at Harry Secombe's singing until somebody told me that it...