Well I was bullied at school, called all kinds of different names. But one day I turned to my bullies and said - 'Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me', and it worked! From…

Quote by Harry Hill

Topics: Funny Quotes, Jokes Quotes

I was doing some decorating, so I got out my step-ladder. I don't get on...

I was doing some decorating, so I got out my step-ladder. I don't get on...

My Dad used to say 'always fight fire with fire', which is probably why he...

My Dad used to say 'always fight fire with fire', which is probably why he...

It's only when you look at an ant through a magnifying glass on a sunny...

It's only when you look at an ant through a magnifying glass on a sunny...

When you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that's a few...

When you see a married couple walking down the street, the one that's a few...

35 is a very attractive age. London society is full of women of the very...

35 is a very attractive age. London society is full of women of the very...

Middle age is when your broad mind and narrow waist begin to change places.

Middle age is when your broad mind and narrow waist begin to change places.

Advice in old age is foolish; for what can be more absurd than to increase...

Advice in old age is foolish; for what can be more absurd than to increase...

Five-second fuses only last three seconds.

Five-second fuses only last three seconds.

It is a sad fact that 50 percent of marriages in this country end in...

It is a sad fact that 50 percent of marriages in this country end in...

How the hell should I know? Most of the people my age are dead. You...

How the hell should I know? Most of the people my age are dead. You...

A stockbroker urged me to buy a stock that would triple its value every year....

A stockbroker urged me to buy a stock that would triple its value every year....

My retirement plan is to find a shopping cart with good snow tires.

My retirement plan is to find a shopping cart with good snow tires.

Weve all met people who are supposedly incredibly intelligent but dont know which way to...

Weve all met people who are supposedly incredibly intelligent but dont know which way to...

In the great books of India, an empire spoke to us, nothing small or unworthy,...

In the great books of India, an empire spoke to us, nothing small or unworthy,...

When I was young, I said to God, 'God, tell me the mystery of the...

When I was young, I said to God, 'God, tell me the mystery of the...

Every schoolmaster after the age of forty-nine, is inclined to flatulence is apt to swallow...

Every schoolmaster after the age of forty-nine, is inclined to flatulence is apt to swallow...

I never said most of the things I said.

I never said most of the things I said.

In every country and every age, the priest had been hostile to Liberty.

In every country and every age, the priest had been hostile to Liberty.

If Monday was a person, it'd be a Ginger...

If Monday was a person, it'd be a Ginger...

Man has will, but woman has her way.

Man has will, but woman has her way.