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I was doing some decorating, so I got out my step-ladder. I don't get on...

I was doing some decorating, so I got out my step-ladder. I don't get on...

It's only when you look at an ant through a magnifying glass on a sunny...

It's only when you look at an ant through a magnifying glass on a sunny...

My Dad used to say 'always fight fire with fire', which is probably why he...

My Dad used to say 'always fight fire with fire', which is probably why he...

Give me one friend, just one, who meets the needs of all my varying moods.

Give me one friend, just one, who meets the needs of all my varying moods.

I have a love interest in every one of my films - a gun.

I have a love interest in every one of my films - a gun.

The biggest disease this day and age is that of people feeling unloved.

The biggest disease this day and age is that of people feeling unloved.

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.

A man never knows how to say goodbye, a woman never knows when to say...

A man never knows how to say goodbye, a woman never knows when to say...

Recession is when your neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose yours. And...

Recession is when your neighbor loses his job. Depression is when you lose yours. And...

Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.

Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.

Trying to sneak a fastball past Hank Aaron is like trying to sneak the sunrise...

Trying to sneak a fastball past Hank Aaron is like trying to sneak the sunrise...

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me!

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me!

Do I listen to pop music because I'm miserable or am I miserable because listen...

Do I listen to pop music because I'm miserable or am I miserable because listen...

My tremendous intuitive sense of the female creature informs me that you are troubled.

My tremendous intuitive sense of the female creature informs me that you are troubled.

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from...

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from...

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh...

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh...

Every age has a kind of universal genius, which includes those that live in it...

Every age has a kind of universal genius, which includes those that live in it...

I don't mind what Congress does, as long as they don't do it in the...

I don't mind what Congress does, as long as they don't do it in the...

To be seventy years young is sometimes far more cheerful and hopeful than to be...

To be seventy years young is sometimes far more cheerful and hopeful than to be...

According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death....

According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death....

So he said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser...

So he said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser...