Quotes about Funny

Why join the navy if you can be a pirate?

#Business, #Funny

If life were fair, Dan Quayle would be making a living asking 'Do you want...

#Funny, #Putdowns

Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labor.

#Bed, #Business, #Funny

A drunk mans words are a sober mans thoughts.

#Drinking, #Funny

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met

#Funny

I found there was only one way to look thin, hang out with fat people.

#Funny

I looked up my family tree and found out I was the sap.

#Funny

A girl phoned me the other day and said ... Come on over, there's nobody...

#Funny, #Women

I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and...

#Funny, #Parents

My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.

#Funny, #Parents

When I was born ... the doctor came out to the waiting room and said...

#Funny, #Parents

My mother had morning sickness after I was born.

#Funny, #Parents