You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

Quote by Dean Martin

Topics: Drink Quotes, Funny Quotes

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

I'd hate to be a teetotaler. Imagine getting up in the morning and knowing that's...

I'd hate to be a teetotaler. Imagine getting up in the morning and knowing that's...

I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up.

I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up.

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. They wake up in the morning and...

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. They wake up in the morning and...

Milton Berle is an inspiration to every young person that wants to get into show...

Milton Berle is an inspiration to every young person that wants to get into show...

I've got seven kids, the three words you hear most around my house are: Hello,...

I've got seven kids, the three words you hear most around my house are: Hello,...

I've got seven kids. The three words you hear most around my house are 'hello,'...

I've got seven kids. The three words you hear most around my house are 'hello,'...

There's a statue of Jimmy Stewart in the Hollywood Wax Museum, and the statue talks...

There's a statue of Jimmy Stewart in the Hollywood Wax Museum, and the statue talks...

If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.

If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.

And the LORD spake unto Aaron, saying, Do not drink wine nor strong drink, thou,...

And the LORD spake unto Aaron, saying, Do not drink wine nor strong drink, thou,...

Thus have we obeyed the voice of Jonadab the son of Rechab our father in...

Thus have we obeyed the voice of Jonadab the son of Rechab our father in...

And she said, Drink, my lord: and she hasted, and let down her pitcher upon...

And she said, Drink, my lord: and she hasted, and let down her pitcher upon...

Tough girls come from New York. Sweet girls, they're from Georgia. But us Kentucky girls,...

Tough girls come from New York. Sweet girls, they're from Georgia. But us Kentucky girls,...

Let stern lessons of yesterdays be your food, your drink, your rest.

Let stern lessons of yesterdays be your food, your drink, your rest.

But their scribes and Pharisees murmured against his disciples, saying, Why do ye eat and...

But their scribes and Pharisees murmured against his disciples, saying, Why do ye eat and...

One reason why I don't drink is because I wish to know when I am...

One reason why I don't drink is because I wish to know when I am...

And the men which were expressed by name rose up, and took the captives, and...

And the men which were expressed by name rose up, and took the captives, and...

There is nothing to which men, while they have food and drink, cannot reconcile themselves.

There is nothing to which men, while they have food and drink, cannot reconcile themselves.

Socrates said, Bad men live that they may eat and drink, whereas good men eat...

Socrates said, Bad men live that they may eat and drink, whereas good men eat...

They gave money also unto the masons, and to the carpenters; and meat, and drink,...

They gave money also unto the masons, and to the carpenters; and meat, and drink,...