I'd hate to be a teetotaler. Imagine getting up in the morning and knowing that's as good as you're going to feel all day.

Quote by Dean Martin

Topics: Dean Martin Quotes

If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.

If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.

There's a statue of Jimmy Stewart in the Hollywood Wax Museum, and the statue talks...

There's a statue of Jimmy Stewart in the Hollywood Wax Museum, and the statue talks...

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. They wake up in the morning and...

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. They wake up in the morning and...

I've got seven kids. The three words you hear most around my house are 'hello,'...

I've got seven kids. The three words you hear most around my house are 'hello,'...

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up.

I once shook hands with Pat Boone and my whole right side sobered up.

Milton Berle is an inspiration to every young person that wants to get into show...

Milton Berle is an inspiration to every young person that wants to get into show...

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

I've got seven kids, the three words you hear most around my house are: Hello,...

I've got seven kids, the three words you hear most around my house are: Hello,...

Children and fools cannot lie.

Children and fools cannot lie.

The best inheritance a parent can give to his children is a few minutes of...

The best inheritance a parent can give to his children is a few minutes of...

Children are not our property, and they are not ours to control any more that...

Children are not our property, and they are not ours to control any more that...

The most effective kind of education is that a child should play amongst lovely things.

The most effective kind of education is that a child should play amongst lovely things.

If only for a half hour a day, a child should do something serviceable to...

If only for a half hour a day, a child should do something serviceable to...

Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once we...

Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once we...

I think that the best thing we can do for our children is to allow...

I think that the best thing we can do for our children is to allow...

A child miseducated is a child lost.

A child miseducated is a child lost.

The whole concept of 'grounding' children is utterly stupid - they just go off and...

The whole concept of 'grounding' children is utterly stupid - they just go off and...

I love children, especially when they cry, for then someone takes them away.

I love children, especially when they cry, for then someone takes them away.

What is in question is a kind of book reviewing which seems to be more...

What is in question is a kind of book reviewing which seems to be more...

Mum comes in and says 'I'm working out,' and she'll just be standing there naked...

Mum comes in and says 'I'm working out,' and she'll just be standing there naked...