You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a fruit fly and still have room enough for three caraway seeds and a producer's heart.

Quote by Fred Allen

Topics: Fred Allen Quotes

I always have trouble remembering three things: faces, names, and - I can't remember what...

I always have trouble remembering three things: faces, names, and - I can't remember what...

Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and...

Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and...

A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the...

A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the...

Imitation is the sincerest form of television.

Imitation is the sincerest form of television.

When a radio comedian's program is finally finished it slinks down Memory Lane into the...

When a radio comedian's program is finally finished it slinks down Memory Lane into the...

Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too...

Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too...

Committee - a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group...

Committee - a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group...

Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just...

Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just...

It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually...

It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually...

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known,...

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known,...

Television is a medium because anything well done is rare.

Television is a medium because anything well done is rare.

It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually...

It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually...

Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars.

Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars.

I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy.

I'd rather have a full bottle in front of me than a full frontal lobotomy.

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the...

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the...

Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.

Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.

California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.

California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.

Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look...

Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look...

Middle age is when you're faced with two temptations and you choose the one that...

Middle age is when you're faced with two temptations and you choose the one that...

Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, youre...

Professional golf is the only sport where, if you win 20% of the time, youre...