Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you.

Quote by Fred Allen

Topics: Fred Allen Quotes

Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just...

Her hat is a creation that will never go out of style; it will just...

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on...

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on...

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian...

We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian...

Imitation is the sincerest form of television.

Imitation is the sincerest form of television.

It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually...

It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually...

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a...

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood, place it in the navel of a...

An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer.

An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer.

A gentleman is any man who wouldn't hit a woman with his hat on.

A gentleman is any man who wouldn't hit a woman with his hat on.

Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission

Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission

Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them...

Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them...

It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually...

It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually...

A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the...

A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the...

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too...

Washington is no place for a good actor. The competition from bad actors is too...

I always have trouble remembering three things: faces, names, and - I can't remember what...

I always have trouble remembering three things: faces, names, and - I can't remember what...

An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy...

An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy...

When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don't adjust the goals, adjust...

When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don't adjust the goals, adjust...

Coming together is a beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success.

Coming together is a beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success.

If A equals success, then the formula is: A = X + Y + Z,...

If A equals success, then the formula is: A = X + Y + Z,...