I have just returned from Boston. It is the only thing to do if you find yourself up there.

Quote by Fred Allen

Topics: Fred Allen Quotes

He writes so well he makes me feel like putting the quill back in the...

He writes so well he makes me feel like putting the quill back in the...

Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of...

Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of...

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the...

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the...

It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually...

It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually...

The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own...

The last time I saw him he was walking down lover's lane holding his own...

An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy...

An actor's popularity is fleeting. His success has the life expectancy of a small boy...

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on...

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on...

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on...

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on...

A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can...

A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can...

I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement.

I play a musical instrument a little, but only for my own amazement.

Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them...

Some movie stars wear their sunglasses even in church. They're afraid God might recognize them...

We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian...

We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian...

Television is a triumph of equipment over people and the minds that control it are...

Television is a triumph of equipment over people and the minds that control it are...

Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission

Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the...

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the...

Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars.

Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for stars.

People's sex habits are as well known in Hollywood as their political opinions, and much...

People's sex habits are as well known in Hollywood as their political opinions, and much...

Ah, stardom! They put your name on a star in the sidewalk on Hollywood Boulevard...

Ah, stardom! They put your name on a star in the sidewalk on Hollywood Boulevard...

I kind of like things slightly out of tune. It makes me feel... intoxicated almost......

I kind of like things slightly out of tune. It makes me feel... intoxicated almost......