When I was a kid, if a guy got killed in a western movie I always wondered who got his horse.

Quote by George Carlin

Topics: Movies Quotes

I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people...

I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people...

What are you going to do, play with your prick for another 20 to 30...

What are you going to do, play with your prick for another 20 to 30...

The more syllables a euphemism has, the further divorced from reality it is

The more syllables a euphemism has, the further divorced from reality it is

Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who...

Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who...

If we could just find out who's in charge, we could kill him.

If we could just find out who's in charge, we could kill him.

I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. We haven't tried that...

I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. We haven't tried that...

In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.

In comic strips, the person on the left always speaks first.

Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.

Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.

Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.

Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.

When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands.

When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands.

Little-known fact: When the stock exchange closes, the guy who comes out on the balcony...

Little-known fact: When the stock exchange closes, the guy who comes out on the balcony...

If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to...

If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to...

I am is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that...

I am is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that...

There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.

There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization

Atheism is a non-prophet organization

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone...

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone...

Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who...

Why is there so much controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who...

Baseball is the only major sport that appears backward in a mirror

Baseball is the only major sport that appears backward in a mirror

Baseball is what we were, and football is what we have become

Baseball is what we were, and football is what we have become

What you have to remember is that baseball isn't a week or a month but...

What you have to remember is that baseball isn't a week or a month but...