They're talking about banning cigarette smoking now in any place that's used by ten or more people in a week, which, I guess, means that Madonna can't even smoke in bed.

Quote by Bill Maher

Topics: Bill Maher Quotes

Religion, to me, is a bureaucracy between man and God that I don't need.

Religion, to me, is a bureaucracy between man and God that I don't need.

President Bush is supporting Arnold but a lot of Republicans are not, because he is...

President Bush is supporting Arnold but a lot of Republicans are not, because he is...

Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease.

Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease.

We are a nation that is unenlightened because of religion. I do believe that. I...

We are a nation that is unenlightened because of religion. I do believe that. I...

This has been a learning experience for me. I also thought that privacy was something...

This has been a learning experience for me. I also thought that privacy was something...

Fame has sent a number of celebrities off the deep end, and in the case...

Fame has sent a number of celebrities off the deep end, and in the case...

The tea baggers. The one thing they hate is when you call them racist. The...

The tea baggers. The one thing they hate is when you call them racist. The...

Nobody sees people as people. It's all how they relate to my little group.

Nobody sees people as people. It's all how they relate to my little group.

Our mistakes from the past are just that: mistakes. And they were necessary to make...

Our mistakes from the past are just that: mistakes. And they were necessary to make...

To me a real patriot is like a real friend. Who's your real friend? It's...

To me a real patriot is like a real friend. Who's your real friend? It's...

Let's face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to...

Let's face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to...

Theyre talking about banning cigarette smoking now in any place thats used by ten or...

Theyre talking about banning cigarette smoking now in any place thats used by ten or...

Jim Bakker spells his name with two k's because three would be too obvious.

Jim Bakker spells his name with two k's because three would be too obvious.

Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease.

Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease.

The jury could get the case as early as next week, but the defense says...

The jury could get the case as early as next week, but the defense says...

A lot of good has come from drugs. I think 'Penny Lane' is worth 10...

A lot of good has come from drugs. I think 'Penny Lane' is worth 10...

Clinton left the White House with all the class of an XFL halftime show.

Clinton left the White House with all the class of an XFL halftime show.

We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying...

We have been the cowards lobbing cruise missiles from 2,000 miles away. That's cowardly. Staying...

Let's make a law that gay people can have birthdays, but straight people get more...

Let's make a law that gay people can have birthdays, but straight people get more...

When you want to make it clear to the rest of the world that you...

When you want to make it clear to the rest of the world that you...