They tend to come out a colour called 'Pants left in wash'

Quote by Eddie Izzard

Topics: Eddie Izzard Quotes

It all bottomed out with the Renaissance Period. Ren-ais-sance. Thats Renaissance, FRENCH for re-birth. Re-nais-sance....

It all bottomed out with the Renaissance Period. Ren-ais-sance. Thats Renaissance, FRENCH for re-birth. Re-nais-sance....

MAC gave me 55 lipsticks to test. These are the same lipsticks I got caught...

MAC gave me 55 lipsticks to test. These are the same lipsticks I got caught...

I wanna live 'til I die, no more, no less.

I wanna live 'til I die, no more, no less.

So my choice is 'Or Death?

So my choice is 'Or Death?

I like my coffee like I like my women. In a plastic cup.

I like my coffee like I like my women. In a plastic cup.

So the American government lied to the Native Americans for many, many years, and then...

So the American government lied to the Native Americans for many, many years, and then...

You killed a hundred thousand people? You must get up very early in the morning!...

You killed a hundred thousand people? You must get up very early in the morning!...

You killed a hundred thousand people? You must get up very early in the morning!...

You killed a hundred thousand people? You must get up very early in the morning!...

I'm a one-man idiot.

I'm a one-man idiot.

Socrates was killed by his own people. He was! [Nods head]. Coz he questioned everything...

Socrates was killed by his own people. He was! [Nods head]. Coz he questioned everything...

Socrates was killed by his own people. He was! [Nods head]. Coz he questioned everything...

Socrates was killed by his own people. He was! [Nods head]. Coz he questioned everything...

Boy bands should be exploded from a great height. They're just pretty people singing music...

Boy bands should be exploded from a great height. They're just pretty people singing music...

We have archeology on television, and I quite like it; its a sort of detective...

We have archeology on television, and I quite like it; its a sort of detective...

So in Europe, we had empires. Everyone had them - France and Spain and Britain...

So in Europe, we had empires. Everyone had them - France and Spain and Britain...

So the American government lied to the Native Americans for many, many years, and then...

So the American government lied to the Native Americans for many, many years, and then...

Never put a sock in a toaster.

Never put a sock in a toaster.

I grew up in Europe, where the history comes from.

I grew up in Europe, where the history comes from.

If you've never seen an elephant ski, you've never been on acid.

If you've never seen an elephant ski, you've never been on acid.